Read the list (if you dare), have a laugh, and enjoy your Friday. (Warning, mature content... or highly immature, come to think of it.)

#1) The Weiner Freedom Initiative - Based on the idea that weiners have been locked up and zipped up -- i.e. "incarcerated" -- for generations, the Weiner Freedom Initiative would grant weiners citizen status, allowing them to obtain New York driver's licenses and vote in political erections.

#2 The Big Brother Weiner Sex Surveillance Act - This special law allows the Mayor of New York to surveil, in real time, anyone engaged in sex acts, anywhere throughout the city. It's all part of protecting New Yorkers from terrorists, of course! (Hat tip to Anthony Gucciardi for this completely inappropriate suggestion...)