SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: November 27, 2022 Edition

11-26-2022 John Semmens

Mayor Lightfoot Responds to Ridicule A tweet from Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot lamenting the slaying of five patrons of Club Q in Colorado Springs sparked an outpouring of ridicule from other Twitter users. In her tweet, the Mayor asked "how many

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: November 20, 2022 Edition

11-19-2022 John Semmens

Profs Declared "Priests of Democracy" This week Chief U.S. District Judge Mark Walker blocked enforcement of Florida's "Stop WOKE Act," saying that "it infringes on the right of university professors to exercise their freedom of speech in their cl

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: November 13, 2022 Edition

11-11-2022 John Semmens

Mandate for More of the Same A chipper President Biden declared victory in the midterm elections, saying "the red wave didn't happen. So, I'm not changing anything." He took special pride from polls showing that 75% of voters are unhappy with the

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: November 6, 2022 Edition

11-05-2022 John Semmens

Biden Rails Against "Enemies of Democracy" President Biden made his closing argument to voters in a largely unwatched TV broadcast. He warned that "failure to vote Democrat means siding with the enemies of our democracy. It's right there on your b

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 30, 2022 Edition

10-29-2022 John Semmens

Leftist Literati Call for Censorship A gaggle of 547 leftist "intellectuals" have signed a letter demanding that Penguin Random House cancel its agreement with Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney Barrett to publish a book she just wrote about maintain

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 23, 2022 Edition

10-22-2022 John Semmens

Voter Intimidation Alleged in Arizona Arizona Secretary of State and current candidate for governor Katie Hobbs (D) charged that "efforts by right-wing extremists to observe ballot drop boxes is a fundamental invasion of a voter's right to cast a

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 16, 2022 Edition

10-15-2022 John Semmens

Dems Blame Moderators Gov. Gretchen Whitmer (D-Mich) and Rep. Elissa Slotkin (D-Mich) blamed their lackluster performances in two separate debates this week on the debate moderators. During her debate with Whitmer, Republican challenger Tudor D

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 9, 2022 Edition

10-07-2022 John Semmens

This week, GOP critics jumped on President Biden's apparent gaffe while campaigning at a Volvo Group Powertrain facility in Hagerstown, Maryland when he said "let me start off with two words: made in America." Dreaded members of the MAGA terroris

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 2, 2022 Edition

09-30-2022 John Semmens

Dem Says Laxalt Abandoned Rape Victims Sen. Catherine Cortez Masto (D-NV) charged her Republican opponent Adam Laxalt with "abandoning rape victims. Instead of sticking with his Attorney General job, where he was very successful, he decided to p

SEMI-NEWS: A Satire of Recent News

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: September 25, 2022 Edition

09-24-2022 John Semmens

Dems Mock GOP's "Commitment to America" This week, House Minority leader Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif) unveiled the Republicans' "Commitment to America" platform. The platform focused on inflation, crime, and the southern border. "Pres