We all know what we mean by the term "mass media" when we say it. What I mean by "mass media" is the aggregate of individuals involved at every level of production—especially in the "news" departments—of all television, virtually every newspaper, and most news magazines in America today. Like you, I have never been personally involved in any event that they managed to report correctly.

Socialist Nick Nolte makes a movie about the mass media and they're unhesitatingly portrayed as illiterate, obnoxious slimeballs. Middle-of-the-roader Burt Reynolds makes a movie about the mass media and they're unhesitatingly portrayed as illiterate, obnoxious slimeballs. Conservative Bruce Willis makes a movie about the mass media and they're unhesitatingly portrayed as illiterate, obnoxious slimeballs. Fascist Clint Eastwood makes a movie about the mass media and they're unhesitatingly portrayed as illiterate, obnoxious slimeballs. Even libertarian John Milius makes a movie about the mass media and they're unhesitatingly portrayed as illiterate, obnoxious slimeballs.

This is not news to the illiterate, obnoxious slime—I mean, to the mass media. They tell themselves—I've been there to hear them do it—that it's a sign they're doing their job right. They're so painstakingly accurate, so minutely unbiased, that nobody benefits unfairly, and, as a natural consequence in this worst of all possible worlds, everybody hates them for it.