Tsunamis are nature's surprise party. The sky is blue, the waves lap the shore gently as usual. No reason to pack up the beach towel – much less run to the car and drive at top speed as fast as you can to the nearest highest ground.

But across the ocean, an earthquake. The wave is coming, even if all looks fine here – for now.

Such an earthquake hit the other day, across the ocean – in Europe. And the tsunami is coming. It will hit us about two years from now. And when it hits, you won't be able to drive fast to the nearest high ground.

Or get away from a psychotic squeegee man.

The European Union has decreed – fatwa'd – that beginning with the 2022 model year, all new cars shall be electronically gelded, forced by software to hew to every speed limit, all the time. The same software – and hardware – that probably two-thirds of all new cars sold here already have – merely awaiting activation.

Helpful, convenient GPS mapping –  so much easier than having to read and handle a paper map, as people used to.

Helpful, convenient "driver assists" – such as the little cameras that enable your car to automatically brake itself when those electronic eyes see another car up ahead, moving more slowly than your car. These cameras also see  – and know, via the GPS mapping data, updated regularly – what the speed limit is on every road you drive.