It starts with a wan zoo baboon. She looks like I'd feel if I was pressed up against the glass of my enclosure, watching another species gawk at me. Which is to say, overwhelmingly sad and tired. Despondent. Suicidal even.

Thousands of kids have toddled up to this baboon to smack their sticky palms against the glass, level with her face. She'd move away from this spot, but it's the only real shade in the afternoon. She's made her peace with the tourist hordes out of necessity. She expects nothing, so she's never disappointed. She gives fewer fucks than any creature I've ever seen.

And then. Some jackball grandpa in a neon white cap shows her a card, and with a flourish, the card is gone. Wan Baboon loses it. Her eyebrows have leapt up before she can stop them, she is incredulous, and outraged. It's magic—and, you know, it's magic.