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News Link • Homeland Security

Thanks, But I’ll Take the Constitution as My 'Passenger Advocate'

• Akers

So naturally, the notion’s garnering plaudits from those perverted morons at the Department of Homeland Security [sic].

UpChuck perennially pursues publicity; last weekend, that quest had him joining one of New York’s state senators to exploit three elderly women from Long Island. Their age and infirmities recently handed the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) an excuse to strip-search them at JFK International Airport – as if carcinogenic scanners and pedophilic pawing of little kids aren’t reason enough to abolish this bureaucracy.
But rather than disband the TSA, our diabolical duo called a press conference. Yes! There they used the victims’ sons as props to hype themselves and their sorry "solution" to the agency’s atrocities: a "passenger advocate" at every airport, drawn from the TSA’s existing ranks of kleptomaniacs, voyeurs, and gate-rapists. Looks as if the unions should "contribute" more heavily to the DNC: here’s an opportunity to add a couple thousand more goldbrickers nationwide (almost 500 commercial airports serve the country, and each would "require" at least one "advocate" per shift), but UpChuck and his sidekick blew it.

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